sitting here, thinking...

so, today i got sick... agian.. i dont know why, but im constantly sick here. and its killing me.

when i woke up this morning i thought of my mom.. the way you feel when you wake up at home, that good feeling. the feel of the sun and the snow, the way your car smells. everything, i missed when i woke up. and it just about killed me.

i miss my mom, i havent talked to her in a long time, and it made me think of how greatful i am to have her. i love you so much. you are one of the strongest women in the world and i respect you so much for it.

we havent been that close my whole life, but i promise now that after this year, that will change. it opened my eyes... showed me i need you in my life.

also, my sisters. i dont know what i would do without my sisters. i know they love me no matter what and it wont change.. they are my life, and i will do anything they need to help him. after this blog i will be writting a email to my rotary club, because they want to take a year off of the youth exchange. and my sister has wanted to do this as long as i have.
they dont understand how this could have such a big effect on someone. they think it is okay to just take a year off.. but this year is my sisters year.. she wants to go. and she wants to grow from it.. i am very disapointed in the club because of this. what if she doesnt have a chance the next year either. she needs to do this, and im upset that my club would fail me like that.. and fail her.

life is full of dissapointments, you just have to move on from it.. and learn to deal with it.

sometimes people will disapoint, but no matter what, forgive them and give them a second chance..
my step mom has recently left my family.. and second chances are a big thing now, and ive realized that everyone deserves a second chance, and to be heard out. it is all going to be okay.

SO. just this past weekend i went to a concert, got back stage and met him and everything it was so cool. got pictures, and then were front and center of the stage. he deitcated a few songs to canada and the US and it was a great night, that was friday.. saturday i went to a club. me and my friend from the US.. and we met so many people.. danced and sang so much. it was a really good night.

my life is good here.. just a few couple twists and turn i gotta get over.. but other then all of that, i am having the time of my life.
Vida e booaaaaa.